For Sale...or Trade

That's right...I am putting my kidneys up for sale (or trade) must be traded for kidneys that don't produce stones though that's the only catch. This is going to be quite the novel...with zero pictures...so if you don't want to know the details on stupid health problems feel free to check back with our blog later!!

On Monday January 3rd I didn't feel so hot. I was cooking dinner and I started to get light headed so Trent took over the meal and I headed to my big jacuzzi bathtub hoping that a nice hot bath would solve the problem. Thirty minutes later I called for Trent because I knew I was passing kidney stones again. We were lucky enough that I happened to be in pain during normal business hours so we headed to the clinic.

I did the usual blood and urine work and then laid on the bed waiting for the doctor. The doctor walked in...took a look at my chart and sent me to the emergency room. I bawled and cried like a little baby and Trent reassured me everything would be okay. We dropped off the kids at his parents house and headed to the hospital. I thought I was going to pass out sitting in the waiting room.

After spending the night at the ER I decided that I have three phrases I hate:

1. Another vein collapsed

The nurse came and took my vitals and did blood and urine work (AGAIN) and then got me back into a room. I informed my nurse that I was very dehydrated because I hadn't been able to keep any food or liquids down but she brushed me off as she began to start an IV. I've been told in the past that my veins are not so easy to get an IV started on and when I am dehydrated it makes it 10 times harder. Well she poked...and she poked...and she poked...and she collapsed a vein (or two!)...and then she finally got it! She kept joking that at least with all her poking it was taking my mind off the pain. WHATEVER! Now I had pain in my kidneys and my arm...retard!

2. The morphine isn't working

Once the IV was started they gave me some morphine and zophran. Usually someone gives me morphine and within minutes I am feeling as high as a kite. Not this time. I think I had to have the nurse come back in like 5 more times and give me another dose before I felt any of the pain relieved. And even then it just barely took the edge off. If you have ever had morphine you know it kind of makes your body feel like jello and your head spin once it does start to work. Let's just say that by the time I left the hospital hours later I could barely focus on anything and I couldn't stand by myself due to all the morphine I was given. Come to find out (after reading my discharge papers) I had a fever which was burning through the pain medication as fast as they could give it to me basically.

3. It might be your appendix bursting

Don't tell me all of the things it MIGHT be while I am waiting to get examined! Are you crazy...I don't care what it might be I just want to know what it is! I have enough experience with kidney stones that I know the pain when I get it. I understand that other things might be wrong but let's just wait until we see the x-ray until we jump to conclusions!!

Finally the doctor came in and took Trent and I to go get an ultrasound. They could see the kidney stone and concluded that it was just pain due to the passing of a kidney stone. They loaded me up with some drugs and some strainers and sent me home.

We stopped by his parents house and picked up the girls and while I was waiting in the car I started to throw up in the bag they gave me. I fumbled into the house and into their bathroom and finished puking and by then I was so weak and my head was spinning so bad that even when I did open my eyes I couldn't focus on anything...it was horrible! Nothing like having to be escorted to the car by two grown men because I couldn't stand on my own!

So I got home and started taking pills...fast forward to 4 days later. Usually I pass kidney stones on my own within 3-5 days. On Saturday the pain was still completely un-tolerable and I was out of pain medication. I knew something wasn't right because I had never had this problem before. So we loaded up and went back to the hospital.

This time I was admitted and given a nice big comfy room. They ran tests...started another IV...and let me know that the doctor wanted me to not eat or drink anything until the next morning in case they needed to do surgery. I didn't really have an appetite so not eating didn't really matter. Sunday morning they did more blood work and I got an x-ray. Erika was at the hosptial with us and the doctors and nurses were so awesome with her. They took her into the back room and showed her how the machines work and then showed her a picture of me. I love when people go above and beyond their job like this!

Anyways back to the story...The x-ray showed that I had a huge calcification blocking the exit of my kidney. They decided to do surgery on Monday afternoon. By this time Sunday afternoon I was starving! My nurse brought me some dinner and I took off the lid to find a pile of meatballs with olives crushed up in it and a side of canned corn...barf-a-roni. I did eat the jello and cheesecake dessert though!

Here is a picture of Lexi wearing my barf bag (un-used don't worry!) as a hat:
I slept alot...barfed alot...and kept the morphine coming in order to avoid any pain! Sunday night they brought me stuff to take a shower so I would be clean and ready for the surgery the next day. In the process of showering the IV became dislodged so I had to get another IV done. The nurse was poking and poking and finally decided to try and get an IV in my hand so she laid my hand on the pillow. I looked away because I can't stand to watch stuff like that when all of the sudden I feel pain and then warm liquid running on my hand. I look over at my hand to no joke see blood spurting out of my hand and my pillow covered in blood. Did you know that blood smells...well it does to me anyways...I seriously about passed out. She applied pressure and put on a bandage and then cleaned up my arm and bed. Apparently she blew through a vein and collapsed another one(whatever that means). Seriously by the time I left the hospital I had bruises up and down both arms and had red needle marks in about 10 other spots. I seriously looked like a drug addict.

So Monday afternoon came and I was wheeled down to surgery. A team of about 10 doctors, nurses, and anesthesiologists crowded around my bed and began to debate on what to do with me. Kind of an overwhelming situation! Finally I was wheeled back to the surgery room. They decided to do a spinal block on me so I would be awake for the surgery. Let me tell you...if I am EVER given the option I will NEVER do a spinal block again. That was the most painful thing I experienced in weeks. I was bent over on the table with my nurse holding me crying (like huge alligator tears streaming down my cheeks) and sobbing and shaking. It was horrible. Then the anesthesiologist leans over to me after he is done and says "I guess there is no chance that you are going to name your first born after me are you" You guessed right buddy...you're on my hit list now!

There was a huge tv screen and the doctor turned it down so that I could see him go in with the scope and jack hammer the calcification up. It was pretty cool to watch! After the surgery was over they took me back up to my room and I was given the choice of either staying one more night or heading home once I could accomplish a checklist of things. I was all for going home and being in my own bed!

Once I was able to use the bathroom, stand for 30 seconds, move my toes, etc I was able to go home!! It felt so good to be home and in my own bed! I was completely weak and couldn't get out of bed and use the bathroom without Trent's help. I was instructed to drink at least 1 tsp of liquid every 10 minutes and alternate between water, juice, and salty broth. The next day my parents drove up from California to pick up the girls and take them home with them. As much as I missed my girls I knew that there was no way I could take care of them by myself while Trent was at school so that was a huge blessing.

Thanks to my wonderful husband for being the best nurse I ever had and all the family, friends, neighbors, etc who helped watch my children and brought over meals. I don't know what we would do without you! It took about 2 weeks to recover but I am doing a lot better now and just have to deal with the severe pain in my back I occasionally get from where I got the spinal block.

Seriously January was just a blur and I am ready to start the new month!